He Didn't Run

As I watched The Passion of the Christ on Easter, I saw that during Jesus' prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane, how much anguish He was in.   He was facing brutal torture and He knew it.  The whipping, beating, and mocking were so very hard to watch without streams of tears run down my cheeks.  He endured this for me.  I had to turn away many times.   Mel Gibson did a masterful job of using flashbacks in this movie.

And as much as we want the anguish that Jesus was wrestling with in the garden to be about that, most scholars believe that the true wrestling was over 2 things:  the taking on the sin of the whole world from ages past to the end of time upon Himself and become that sacrifice lamb; and then the separation that would have to take place when the Father turned His face away from Jesus as He hung on that cross.  I can't even imagine!

Whatever the reason, (and it may be all 3) Jesus agonized for quite a while, so much so that He asked that the Father, "Take this cup from Me."  Mk 14:36  But when He had struggled through, He relinquish His will to that of the Father's, "Yet not as I will, but as You will." Mt 26:39  He knew the plan.  He knew that He would be the sacrifice.  Then with resolve He stood up to carry out that plan.  

The thing that got me as I studied it Scripture was that when He went over to the disciples to wake them once more, He said, "Arise! Let us go! Here comes My betrayer!" Mk14:42  He wasn't saying, "they're here, let's get out of here!"  No, Jesus headed into the persecution, actually addressing the guards 1st before they had a chance to inquire of Him.  And of course, He never denied who He was.  I don't know about you, but I'm not sure that I wouldn't turn tail and run, especially knowing it all ahead of time.

Seeing that this time was such a comfort to me.  Here was Jesus, in all His humanness, struggling with what He was facing.  He struggled like we do.  And yet when the time came, He manned up to carry out the purpose for His coming.  There was a greater cause for which to die.    It wasn't that He struggled, but that He followed through.  He face death square and went through with the plan.  Lord, may I too be found that faithful!

A Testimony

Last fall, there was a lady who was referred to me by one of my Bible study ladies.  She had just discovered her husband's unfaithfulness.  My heart went out to her so much!  She was so angry and so hurt, so my 1st time with her I just sat and listened.  

Over the next few weeks I tried to build a relationship with her.  I shared different aspects of God's love for her as much as I could.  This was always met with anger, why would God allow this, and questions.  I did my best to tell her the truth as it was found in Scriptures.  She had the world's view of the Gospel that I worked at combating plus she had her own ideas of what a Christian was.  It took an incredible amount of determination and patience and just being there for her.  But love broke through.

I thought for sure she just wasn't interested in God or anything about Him, she just wanted my company.  One time, after much discussion about the Gospel, I finally just asked her if she wanted to ask Him into her life.  She looked at me and said that if it was something that she should do, then she wanted to do it.  Simple as that!  So I prayed with her to accept Jesus as her Savior.   I left her with the small green book The Romans Road to Salvation and left.

I wasn't able to check back in with her for about a week, but when I called, she told me that she just couldn't stop reading that little green book.  She propped it up everywhere she went and read it.  God is so good!  When I finally got back to her, there was a definite countenance change.  I don't think I had ever seen her so happy.  I wish I could say that it remained, but it didn't.

The next few months became warfare for her soul!  Usually there is a grace period when someone comes into the Kingdom.  Her grace period lasted only a week or 2.  But I prayed, called and visited with her often, giving her hope and encouragement.  She just clicked with one of the young ladies in the Bible study group, she herself had just rededicated her life to the Lord.  These 2 struck up a hard fast relationship, they were a generation apart in age, but that worked for them.  The new convert became grandma to the young one's small children.

During the holidays, she had a time to get away to her daughter's place in Jersey.  She needed it.  While there, they talked of her moving there on a more permanent basis.  It took a couple of months but she finally made the move.  I was worried that if she left, that she would abandon the Lord because life would become easier.  I had given her the New Testament on CDs, and asked her to please take them so that she could stay strong.

Yesterday I got a call from her.  We chatted a bit.  She is so happy being there and has made the decision to stay and not return to her home.  I asked her if she remembered to take the CDs with her.  She had and she listens to them often. Yay!  She was so excited, she said that when the TV show Jeopardy came on and there were opportunities to answer Biblical questions, not only did she know what they saying now, but she also got the questions right! Double Yay!

The Holy Spirit is so wonderful and so good!  His desires is to see men set free and to succeed in their growth in Him.  I am still praying for her and hoping she finds a fellowship close by in which to grow with.  So if you think about her please pray for her.  She still needs the body of Christ to gather around her even if its only in prayer at the moment.

Yada, Yada, Yada

I had just gotten in my minivan after a really neat opening God  gave me to share the Gospel with 2 young ladies who were giving me my perm.  They were talking about sex outside of marriage which opened the door for me to share. When I turned on the radio, Focus on the Family was on.  They had a guest who was talking about the word "yada".  She said that you often hear people flippantly used the phrase, "Yada, yada, yada" when they mean “yakity-yak-yak”- empty words that means nothing.  That couldn’t be further from the truth.  

Then she began to talk about Genesis 4:1, when it says that Adam knew his wife Eve and she became pregnant. The word used in this context is the same word in the Hebrew to mean “to know” or to know intimately.  She said the Hebrew word is actually “ya-da” which simply means to know, to be known, to be respected. This is also the same word used for "Be still and know that I Am God." found in Psalms 46:10.

She went on to say that this word is used in the Bible so much more in terms of getting to know God intimately than it was used to refer to the physical act.  God’s desire is for us to pursuit Him to get to “know” Him.  I thought it’s probably the same word Moses used in Exodus 33:13 when he made a request for God to show him His ways that he may “know” Him.  Moses wanted more than just His ways, but to “know” Him, to know God intimately.  He wanted to get into the heart of God.  I went home, studied that word and found so much more.

  

When a couple marries, they learn to know their spouses interests, their concerns, their quirks.  Intimacy is more than just physical; it’s getting to know that person.  There are special things that only the 2 of them know.   That is the same with our Lord.   Another definition to the word "ya-da" is to be privy to.   There are certain things that God will reveal to you only in the secret place.   Jeremiah 33:3 says, “Call to Me [pursuit Me], and I will answer you, and tell you [some versions say, ‘show you’] great and unsearchable things you do not know.” 

I found it very interesting that that particular show would be on after the conversation I had with these girls.  Not only is it a lesson for these girls, it's a lesson for us as well.  So make time in that busy schedule to get to know, “ya-da” God.  Shove away from anything that hinders that kind of fellowship with Him.  It’s a price worth paying!

We Are All Different

On my way to teach Bible study this evening, I was determined to make the most of this one no matter how many came to the study.  And true to my sense, there was just 3 of us. I had prayed, "Lord, You died for the many, but You also died for the 1."  We were just going over homework tonight, so I figured I wouldn't have many.  Toward the end of the Beth Moore series, her homework take quite a bit of time, so we devote a lesson time for that.  It was also Valentine's Day so I figured the numbers would be down.  

The 2 I  had tonight are the 2 that always do their homework ahead of time & they are my regulars.  And because we were a smaller group tonight, my quiet one once again felt  that she could speak.  She asked a question that lead to a discussion about the idea of going to church.  She has a hard time feeling like she fits in in the churches she's been to.  She is quiet so I think she has a harder time allowing herself to be comfortable in a church setting if there is no one else her age there.

I think it's so important as the body of Christ to make a person feel welcomed when they step into the doors of our churches, get to know their names, & check up on them once they go out the door.  A lot of churches do well with the welcoming part, but then quickly forget them once it's over.  And sometimes it takes time for them to acclimate to their new surroundings, others have no problem just fitting right in.   You want to make them feel like they matter & that you care.

I was so glad she spoke up about her true feelings.  We have decided to check out some new churches for her to see if she will feel comfortable in the ones close by.  Since she is looking for young adults her age, that will weigh heavy on that decision.  I have come to learn that not everyone worships the Lord the same way.  I love that Lord makes us all different, & worship Him differently!  I can't wait to see what God brings of this!

TMI - Too Much Information!

The radio talk show hosts were discussing the recent presidential primary.  The comment was made that the more the candidates talk the more mistakes they will be making.  That is true of anybody not just the candidates.   The Scriptures are full of passages warning that for the one who talks too much it will become their undoing.   Proverbs 10:8b says, “. . . and a chattering fool comes to ruin.”  And verse 19 says, “When words are many, sin is not absent, . . .”   

The latest craze on social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter is to be completely open about what you are doing at any given moment, to be real about your feelings.  As Christians we are to be honest before others.  But it’s one thing to be honest and another thing to be bare.  It seems discretion is a foreign idea on these sites.  As Christians we are to be witnesses 24/7.  The more open you are, the more that is revealed about the true nature of your heart.  Jesus chastised the Pharisees when He said, “For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” Matthew 12:34. 

Many believe that because their settings are private that what they say will stay where it’s posted.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  People know people.  Bosses do gain access.  Colleges do find out one way or another the information they seek.  Friends talk to friends.  Not only that, what has been posted cannot be undone whether you delete it or forget it.  Don’t be quick to post or send a rash statement into cyber-space, then regret what has been said later.   The second half of verse 19 says, “ . . . but he who holds his tongue is wise.”

“But I tell you that men will have to give account

on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.

For by your words you will be acquitted, 

and by your words you will be condemned.”

Matthew 12:36-37

One of the Hardest Things

Tonight I suspended my Facebook account. It was harder than I thought it would be.  I inbox-messaged most of my family & friends to tell them that I was going to be doing this & why.  I then started receiving messages in return: "why would you do that?" "you have blessed me greatly!" "I love your pictures!" "I will miss you!"  When I finally got around to doing it, I cried.  This was a place that I connected with them.  As my cousin said this was a place for her to connect with us.

You see, God has been convicting me for quite awhile about the amount of time I spend on Facebook.  I still had my time with Him, wonderful times with many blessings & answered prayers.  But I would check Facebook often during a day & I was feeling convicted.  What would start out as just checking in, would end up being hours lost.  Because I am such a people person, I couldn't just get right off.  I had been praying a long time for even more of God, but He kept telling me that I was hindering Him.

Yesterday's services were so good, so convicting!  The hand of God was upon me & I knew it.  In the morning service, Pastor Bill talked about being intentional with your walk with God.  He said that if we were to stand before God's throne, how would we rate our relationship to Him?  He spoke from I Cor. 9:24-27 about running the race in such a way as to get the prize.  Paul was saying to be intentional, not willy-nilly like a boxer beating the air.  When I read that passage, my eyes fell on verse 27 where Paul talks about making your body your slave & not the other way around - another point to add to making your life intentional - so as to win as many as possible (v:19).  I have not been intentional enough.  My heart was convicted to the core!

Then in the evening service, Pastor Mike spoke out of I Peter 3:3-4.  We are not to be adorned on the outside, be a shallow Christian, but be real to the core of your being.  Is the Lord saying to us, "But your heart is not mine."  He told us that the enemy comes in subtle compromises. I think that's where I have gotten to.  God sees great potential in us, but we don't live up to that potential.  The hand of God was upon me one more time.  I went to the altar, got down on my face before Him & cried in repentance.  I knew what I had to do.

I have gone through this before with the TV.  When I was a young mother, I got caught up in watching it most my waking hours.  I felt so far from God, so numb.  But I wanted a closer relationship with him.  He said then that TV was my god.  I spent way more time at its feet than His.  Ouch!  Finally one evening while doing the dishes, again I cried out to Him. I clearly heard Him in an audible voice say, "Then get rid of that TV." Period, end of story.  It just so happened to be trash night, soooo . . .  yes, I threw it out. In the garbage. That was being picked up the very next day. And I did not get it back out.  I told my husband & he said that it was about time!

Once I did that, I took that time in the evenings & spent it in worship with Him.  It seemed like those few hours flew by.  God began to open doors, yes doors, to ministry.  My time with Him became sweeter & more powerful.  His anointing flowed like never before.  I wouldn't give that up for the world!  So here I am again. I know what is ahead.  There is such a fight, but it's worth it.  The rewards out weigh it all!

The Fight is On

It is interesting how the Lord brings us through seasons.  God uses these seasons to grow us in ways we wouldn't flourish any other way.  As time goes on I am astounded by the mercy and wisdom of God! Why? I'm not really sure because He is God.  Maybe it's more my discovery of Who He is.

God had brought me, quite a few years ago, through a season of fasting and spiritual warfare.  I felt called to prayer, but most especially spiritual warfare.  The battles were in tense.  During that time we lost my husband's brother, then a year later my own mother.  God taught me much in those years of great trial.  But I got so weary in the battles. I rarely had joy. I felt heavy laden with the burdens I was carrying.

Soon I began to question whether doing spiritual warfare was the most effective way to deal with the enemy. In my turmoil, I had asked the Lord if worship wouldn't be the better way to go.  And He began to take me down that road of learning.  That was a wonderful season of sitting at His feet.  I began to study all the worshipers of the Bible.  The Holy Spirit was gracious in teaching me.  I learned not only to use music to re-center my focus, but also learned to express worship without using other people's words. Now there was an exercise in growth! Oh my! I was becoming a David of the Bible. This was a tough lesson for me because I am NOT one who can articulate well.  I default to phrases that I already knew, but God insisted I be heart-felt. Not only did this take me to a deeper level in Him, but the words I spoke began to increase my faith so much more than before. I remembered the words from Romans 10:17, "Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God."  I was being built up, as well as, being given tools for the fight.

Now I'm beginning to see that God is calling me back into the ring again.  As we have been ministering in Clairton, our eyes are quickly opened to the warfare ensuing all around us.  There isn't a week or a day that goes by that it doesn't smack us right in the face. In doing this Beth Moore Bible study, I am brought right back to the fact that we are in a war for the lives and souls of men, women, and children all around us.  Satan want's the victory, but as Beth reminds us, he can't wear the crown of victory!  

Now I've been given the tools of worship and warfare in the ministry of intercession.  As I go out onto the battle front, I go prepared in prayer and worship.  Then we engage in the warfare.  The Holy Spirit has also helped me to understand the importance of speaking blessings over the area.  I can't wait to see what God has in store for Clairton "the City of Prayer"!